I hopped down from my windowsill and began prancing around, checking in on all my people.

They were my servants.

The big one with the long hair—I think the humans (pronounced who-mens) call her “Mom”—was my favorite. Her job was to snuggle me and feed me, making her my primary caregiver. The others simply seemed to make her job easier. The smaller girl brushed me on the days Mom didn’t, and the boys cleaned up my poop whenever I didn’t feel like using the litter box.

Then there was the man. I’m not entirely sure what his purpose is, but I’m fairly certain his name is “Dad.” Personally, I’d get rid of him, but he makes Mom very happy, so I’ve decided to let him stay.

Then there are the dogs.

I despise them.

They bring shame upon all animals. Somehow they’ve lowered themselves to the level of humans. They even poop outside.

Disgraceful.

Unfortunately, they’re much bigger than I am, so there isn’t much I can do about it.