Ally tied on her apron, stuck her order pad in her pocket, added her two favorite pens, and pulled her hair up into an efficient bun. The sigh that had been a daily companion for the last four years, two months and three days didn't tag along. Lighter somehow, she shoved open the swinging doors to the kitchen and stepped out into the maelstrom. It was like being hit by a massive wall of sounds all echoing off one another, and as always, Ally was surprised at how much she enjoyed it.

"Hey pretty lady," an old man said with a toothy grin.

"Hey yourself, Mr. Gainer." Ally leaned into the hug the man offered. "Does Mrs. Gainer know you're down here making eyes at me?"

He laughed and Ally heard the rattle in his chest. "Well, since you're here, let me get you a pint on me."

"Ah, now there's a woman who knows how to treat a man." Mr. Gainer kissed her cheek and Ally put in an order for his favorite Samuel Adams lager.

Ally put in orders, took food to hungry families, held a baby who was overtired from the misery of teething, and laughed until her sides hurt. "I'm out for the night, George," she called, ignoring the way her feet were begging to be rid of the demon shoes she was wearing.

"See you tomorrow, Allycat. Be sure to have Sam walk you out."

"Will do."

Sam, the muscle-y bouncer, stood up when she approached. "You look ready to drop."

"Nah," Ally smiled. "This is how I always look. Don't you like it?"

Sam grinned. "Girl, go home, open a good bottle of wine and sleep until your shift tomorrow."

"Wish I could, but mothering duty calls."

"Let them sleep until your shift tomorrow too."

Ally laughed. "My fondest dream."

Two hours later, Ally finally had her last child tucked into bed. She didn't open a bottle of wine, but she did take a hot shower and crawl into bed. Then she pulled the extra pillow close and breathed in the familiar scent of her husband's deoderant. The tears that had flooded his pillow in the beginning trickled out now. "I miss you Davey."

Ally did remember, had noticed that the sigh hadn't come today. As she slipped out of the kitchen that first time she'd felt lighter. Davey was still gone.
But somehow she was feeling more open about life.

Not missing him less. Just...missing him. No more bargaining against reality, no more worries about things outside her control...well, less worrying anyway. He was slowly being put in a necessary place, places within her heart and her life. She had children - they, had children and it was important that life not stop. That would happen when she joined him. No reason to hurry that, other than missing him. She thought of her father. So much death around him growing up, mother, brothers and she had asked him about that once. He'd called death a 'part of life' and offered the practical 'what can you do about it'. She'd see him too one day, it brought a smile. Death was really only sad for the living; she wondered if Davey missed her and the kids.

Ally got up earlier than she would've if she were single and no kids. But then that had been a different time. She hadn't worked at the bar she was headed for work now. Back then it was clubs, the action, the mostly annoying guys hitting on her...but that one or two that weren't so annoying. She smiled without thinking. Not about the guys but at the thought of those guys accompanying her back to her place now - stepping on Legos in the dark, having to be quite, no lingering on the way out before one of the kids woke. What a different world! she laughed to herself, mostly glad to be done with that world. The bar now was pretty much just that, a bar. It could get rowdy when there were games at the stadium and rivalries spilled over or if vacationers took it too far. But between Sam and any one of her regulars she had no worries about her safety in there.

Her biggest worries revolved around the kids. Davey Jr. was getting into racing now that he had his license, but he was good at it! Little Ally was no longer little and she was doing well in school, but she liked to hang around with Davey Jr. at the garage and the guys there had noticed Ally wasn't little. Cloud was only a toddler. Her having to pick up hours at work was harder on him, but in a way it was good for little Ally to get some heavy experience of 'motherhood' before she had kids of her own and Davey Jr. knew how much Cloud loved to go fast. So he would take him on all sorts of quick trips, always being sure that Cloud was down on the floor in the back seat - safest place in a crash. Plus, Davey Jr. was a light drinker. If he really loaded up he never took Cloud along.

Lost in thought Ally took a straight line through the intersection on a red light. She didn't even know why the blue lights and siren were pulling in behind her as she pulled to the side to let them through.
The cop's car door opened in her rearview, Ally ducked to her glove compartment for the registration...which was always buried deep in its recesses.
She heard the car door open almost as she felt the force of the pull yank her across the seat and out the door onto the ground!

"Do you have a weapon?!"
It was a pleasant female voice? Ally looked up, surprised at the voice that seemed to be behind the force that had so easily disembarked her from the car.

"Crystal? Is that you!" Ally couldn't believe it.

"Huh..." the cop voice registered surprise (her eyes were shrouded behind mirrored aviators). Then, "Alleycat?!" in an excited tone of recognition.

They had worked together. At one of the clubs, an adult one. 'Crystal' was a dancer then, now Officer Lindsey Glownia. 'Alleycat' had been a name informally but universally agreed upon for Ally at that club, Mr Gainer had followed her to the bar from that club.
"Why'd ya pull me over, miss me?" Ally smirked
"I'd a known it was you I'd a put the cuffs on!" Crystal laughed
Both obviously delighted to be reconnecting