I just got back home… ready to place my beautiful new plant on the windowsill.
“I love my new plant and I can’t wait to take care of it forever,” I thought. I decided to name it Christopher.
“chhchchhchhchch”
I pondered at what the sound could be. I returned from the kitchen until I heard the noise again-
“chhchchhchhchch”
I turned towards the windowsill, not ready for the huge shock. It was my plant. He was dying.
Christopher was dying.
“wHy MaStEr? WhYyYyY?” he said- with a soft wail.
“wh-what OH MY GOD what happened? I literally just bought you!”
“aUgHhHhHh”
“How is this even possible?”
“NoBoDy KnOwS.”
Those were his last words. I hyperventilated. I hurried to the fridge, to grab my green apple I left there half an hour ago.
“wHy MaStEr?”
CHRISTOPHER II was dying too. This day cannot get any worse.
“WHAT?! I JUST PUT YOU IN THE FRIDGE-”
“Actually though, I have no idea why this happens” Christopher II enunciated…
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO”
My scream echoed through the empty walls of my home. To make myself stop mourning about Christopher and Christopher II, I went to the local garden store. After 3 long hours of browsing through plants, I finally found a worthy successor for Christopher. And this made me happy, so I didn’t feel there was a reason to find a descendant for Christopher II.
Time passed. I was feeling better in general. I was playing video games with my friends when things start to get weird again.
“HEY MASTER… CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING QUICKLY” a loud voice spoke. I didn’t know where it was coming from. “It’s been 2 WEEKS since the last time you watered me!”
“I guess I forgot…”
“OH, I’M SORRY TO REFRESH YOUR MEMORY. NOW IF YOU DON’T MIND… I NEED WATER TO
SURVIVE!” he shouted
“Okay… uh… here you go,” I poured a glass of water on the plant
“I like that,” I kept watering “wait, slow down…”
“What happened?” I questioned
“You are DROWNING me. I’m about to die now.”
“But you said that you needed water…”
“I know what I said but TOO MUCH water makes me die.”
“Oh… sorry,” I said- solemnly
“This is unbe*leaf*able…”
“Hahaha that’s a good plant pun.”
“I guess my *tyme* has come…”
“I am so sorry, Benjamin. I didn’t mean to kill you.”
After my three most precious plants died to my own ignorance, I doubted my plant caring abilities. I always thought plants were special to me, after all, I can hear their internal screaming every time I mess up. I ether starve or drown my plants, no in-between. Was it even possible for me to be worthy to keep plants? It didn't matter. There was one thing I had to do now.
Two hours later.
"Done," I say with relief. I wipe my forehead triumphantly. I had created three beautiful tiny graves for my three plants that had suffered so much through my incompetence. Each one had their names on it. Christopher. Christopher II. Benjamin. I wasn't sure if they would go anywhere after their death... like plant-heaven or something. But they would live on in my hearts at least.
"IT'S TIME. I'm trying something different. Something that will prove if I'm really green-thumbed at all. I'm going to care for a plant from scratch."
I grabbed an apple from my fridge, one that was somehow still alive, and brutally sliced it open to remove it's offspring: seeds. I could hear the tiny whispers of the seeds, just little babies ready to grow into tall apple trees. I gently placed one seed inside a pile of dirt in my plant pot and dropped a tiny amount of water on top of the dirt.
"That's it."
I moved back with my hands in the air, cautious for if I would accidently kill it somehow.
"If this thing doesn't grow by tomorrow, then I guess I'm not a plant keeper after all..."